guilty

So, I realize I haven't blogged in a couple of weeks. Every time I think about doing it, I get queezy because I know that my last blog was about Chrissa. In a way I feel like if I keep blogging, I'm covering her up... that, if I blog about what we did this weekend, it's going to be in front of the Chrissa blog, and I want everyone to know what a special little girl she was and I don't want that post to just get... lost in everything. It makes it seem like what happened is almost insignificant. My life just keeps going on and that blog is just a tidbit of something that happened in my life and ok here we go on to the next thing. And it's not... but I do realize that life DOES go on. It's just hard to transition I guess? Going from writing something so emotional and so close to my heart and then just going into 'oh hey so we had a fun weekend!'... it just seem's wierd to me. So, lets call this my 'transition' blog. I'm still very saddened by what happened, it's still hard every day, and I haven't gone a day without crying yet, but I know it will get easier. I'll never forget that little girl, and I'll always remember how this has effected me, and how she touched so many people. But we all have to go on. It's hard, but the world didn't stop. We have to go about our lives, still remembering her, but not stopping our lives because she is gone. Junior doesn't want anyone doing that, he got mad at me for just taking a couple days off of work... he wants us to remember his daughter as a happy little baby girl, and to live our lives, and be happy. And that's just what I'm going to do.