Well, around 5:30 or so I had dialated enough to start pushing. I was excited. I was tired, and ready to get on with it. I don't know how women do hours and hours of labor. I was 7 hours in and was pretty much had my fill. The nurses came in though, and told me they were going to 'wait' a little longer, to let the contractions push the baby down a little more. ::sigh:: so we waited. And waited. And waited a bit more. By the time I was really feeling the need to push the nice afternoon nurses walked in with their replacements. Informed me it was shift change time, and that I'd have to wait a little longer so they could get all settled in.
Really? Yea Christina, really. Soooo finally about 10 to 8:00pm they were 'ready' for me to push. Now, that whole feeling of a person coming out of you is very... odd. I did have an epidural, so I didn't feel much. It just felt like I had a big poop. I know, not the nicest way to put it, but that's how it felt. I had a gazillion people in the room. At that point, I didn't really care. I just wanted it to be over with. I'm also not the most modest person out there. We all have the same parts (well, you know men have their parts, women have theirs...) so I'm really not embarassed. I never have been really.
Shiny peny time: I used to come home from karate/work when I was younger, and strip at the door, and walk around in undies and bra for a while. My mom always used to tease me about being an exhibitionist. Meh... I just don't like clothes.
So there I am, room full of my family, Bobby's family, my besties, out in all my glory trying to get this ba
by out. Now, all I can feel is pressure, the poop feeling. Well, this dumb nurse has her fingers aparantly all in me saying 'get to this point!'. Um, last I checked I had an epidural lady, I don't feel your fingers to be able to get that babies head down to that spot. I was SO annoyed with her. She just kept telling me 'if you don't push, we're going to have to do a C-section!'. That biotch was lucky I didn't kick her in the damn face. I was deathly afraid of a C-section. I didn't want them cutting my stomach muscles (I'd be doomed to be fat forever if that happened) I wanted to experience child birth the way God intended, and here she is trying to tell me she's gonna cut my kid out. She's lucky I didn't go with what I was thinking and verbally assault her. She kept telling me to bear down, and then my mom thought she was being helpful by reitterating what the nurse was telling me. Stop telling me to bear down! I'm pushing for crying out loud leave me the crap alone! I ended up yelling at my mom, when really I wanted to direct it at the nurse, but I was sort of at her mercy since she would be taking care of me and the baby. So I refrained from telling her to STFU and kicking her in the face. Really, that's what I wanted to do. So I had been pushing for like, I don't know, 20 minutes maybe? Well all of a sudden the nurse is telling me 'oh your doctor is coming, you're going to have to wait for her to do the rest, just rest for a few minu
tes'. Now, anyone who's been in labor before knows you can't just 'stop' mid way through. Are you serious lady??? The contractions are coming and this baby is gettin pushed out. So, whilst the nurses walk away and 'hang out' waiting for the Dr., I'm still pushing through my contractions. Somewhere around now is when my besties started pointing out that my epi was like almost GONE. Epi-king was quick and got a new one on there. Thank GOD. I wouldn't have been able to handle giving birth with no epi with that crazy pitocine in my body.
My Dr. finally gets there, and the babies head is literally like, crowning.
I pushed and remember feeling relief. Well, that was Lilly's head popping into the world saying 'hi'. After that I'm thinking in my head 'yes! ok last one and she's out'. Nope, not so much. My Dr. said 'hold on, no more pushing'. REALLY?? Well, aparantly she had to fix something, idk, I don't remember, I just remember being annoyed. Here I am, legs spread in all their glory, and 15 people all lookin at my girly bits (or what was left of them at that point), and she says stop. Thanks. Then all of a sudden I hear a group 'gasp' and shocked faces all around me. I immediatly freak out... turns out, it was just the baby... RIPPING HER ARM OUT OF MY VAG. Yes, really. She pulled her own arm out. She was impatient with the dr. too. She's definitely my girl. My doctor gave me the okay to finish pushing, and our little princess came into the world at 8:27PM.
I really only pushed for like 35 minutes.
This is her coming out, yes I utilized the 'crop' function of my picture editor. You're welcome.
My Dr. asked me if I wanted her as soon as she came out. Um, YES! She plopped her down right on my belly, and even though she was screaming, she looked right at me. That moment was the single most defining, beautiful, exhilirating moment of my life. Looking at this little baby that had been growing inside of me for near 10 months. Wow...
"All the lines that held me to my life were sliced apart in swift cuts, like clipping the strings to a bunch of balloons. Everything that made me who I was - disconnected from me in that second and floated up into space. I was not left drifting. A new string held me where I was. Not one string, but a million. Not strings but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying me to one thing - to the very center of the universe. The gravity of the earth no longer tied me to the place where I was. It was the baby girl in my arms that held me here now."
6lbs 11oz, 19" long June 6th, 2010
Yes, she really did come out this perfect. Straight from me she came out PERFECT. No, she was not swollen, she was not cone headed, she was not smooshed... She was perfect. I know babies aren't SUPPOSED to come out looking great, and they look pretty funky for the most part, but not Lilly... no. She glammed it up for her debut. She came out perfect and beautiful. I know all moms say that, but seriously, she's the prettiest baby I've ever seen. And it's not just because seh is mine. I remember thinking 'does she have all her toes and fingers? Of course she does, she's my baby', and then saying out loud 'she's pretty right??'. Ha! I'm a good mom. Really.
The room was a huge flurry. They only let me hold her for a few moments before they took her to get her all 'cleaned up'. I remember looking at my husband and thinking 'wow, we MADE her. Our love MADE that baby'. Wow... it's just amazing how God works. I've never seen or experienced anything so completely wonderful. My little girl is the most amazing gift God could ever give me. I never understood the love my mom really has for me, until I laid eyes on that little girl. You never truly understand true love until you have a child come from you. It's amazing.
And now the furry of pictures after she arrived:
Our first family picture. I didn't position Lilly like that, she turned her head to look at her big brother. His face is just so full of wonder. See the monkey by my head? Ryan brought it for his baby sister. He shows it to her all the time and tells her 'Lilly I got this for you', and then he pushes the music part of it. He's very sweet with his sister. (psst, see his big brother t-shirt I made him? I know, it's awesome)
She was so aware from the moment she came into the world. Do you see her looking at me?
The aunties
My mommy and sissy
My mommy (grammie) and Lilly
Carol (grandma) and Lilly
Lisa (Nana) and Lilly
While they were cleaning the baby, and everyone left me to go look at her, my besties had my back and hung out with me so I wasn't alone. That's why they are my best friends, these girls are my rock. I don't know many people who have girls like these in their lives. Shoot, any friend that will sit in a hospital room for 10 hours gets best friend award of the year. Hands down.
Daddy showing Ryan the baby when she was getting all weighed and what not.
Auntie Shannyn finally got to hold her once we got in the recovery room
There are so many more pictures, and so much more I could say, but I thinkt his post is growing long, and you're all not as excited as I am about all this, so I'll leave this here. :-)
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